


don't let go (keep a hold)

by dearmoonlight



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Pre-Canon, Sibling Bonding, like...way before the canon timeline, me? writing the amagis as babies? more likely than you think
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:54:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24156214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dearmoonlight/pseuds/dearmoonlight
Summary: And Rinne is no longer a lonely child or the heir to a throne, but anolder brother.Somehow, it feels much more important.
Relationships: Amagi Hiiro & Amagi Rinne
Comments: 14
Kudos: 77





	don't let go (keep a hold)

The thing is, Rinne doesn’t have trouble remembering a time before Hiiro.

It’ll probably be far more special if he didn’t. If he could honestly say that his little brother has always been there, a lingering light in the shadows of his cage. But Rinne remembers - remembers being alone and feel unloved, indifferent to the praise and the sweet words of the adults around him. Talking, always talking about how he would lead them one day, how special he was, how irreemplazable. Because Rinne was the firstborn, because he was supposed to wear a crown. 

They turned away when he tried to eat dirt, or paint with his fingers, ignored his stories about hunting bugs in the forest, reprimanded him when he tried to make friends with the other children. And they said, like a chant: You’re going to rule. Don’t lower yourself to that level.

(And later on in his life Rinne thinks: _What’s demeaning about being a kid when you’re literally three years old?_ But it’s too late for the child of the past, ashamed and confused and always an outsider in his own little village.)

He didn’t even think that Hiiro could be that important. For eight long months, he is just a lump in his mother’s belly, nothing more than a nuisance for the hunt and the long walks in the snow. 

Then, a summer night like any other, his mother lets out a groan of pain, and she supports her whole weight into a chair. Rinne should probably be more scared than he is at the sound, but he doesn’t even have enough time to process it before his father is getting up from the table and walking in long strides to her side, whispering in a low voice that he’s two weeks early.

The delivery is long and torturous. Rinne knows what’s happening, has seen it before - just animals and two women from the village since he was born. So he waits, locked into his room and under his covers, unable to sleep but also too afraid to step into the hallway. Sometimes a muffled scream comes through the walls, and Rinne curls into himself. He doesn’t cry, because water is too precious to waste, but for a second he wonders what will he do if his mother dies, like a pained animal, like cattle. Like someone that disappears into the night to never come back.

(She doesn’t.)

She doesn’t, and Rinne is still too young to understand the kind of love that flows through him at the sight of his mother, sweaty and tired and incredibly _alive_ as she smiles weakly at him.

His mother has never feel as warm as she does when Rinne climbs to her bed, eyes wet and knees shaking from the utter relief of being able to fall into her embrace again. She holds him close with one arm, presses her lips to his temple.

(Rinne can’t remember the last time his mother let him hug her without warning him about how a king should never behave like that. She smells like sweat and blood this time, but it’s still somehow comforting.)

“Rinne.” his father’s voice startle him, and Rinne flinches. His eyes turn to him immediately, and he does his best to appear stern and solemn. “You might hurt her.”

“It’s fine.” his mother replies, and she makes an undefined pattern into his back with the palm of her hand. “Bring Hiiro here, would you? I want them to meet.”

His father sighs, but he complies. Rinne keeps his gaze fixated in the lump of blankets between his arms. There’s a little fist blooming between them, shaking aimlessly into the air, and Rinne thinks that he’s showing a lot of energy for a newborn. Maybe being restless runs in the family.

His father kneels before him, and Rinne finally takes a peek down at the baby resting in the curve of his arm. 

The first thing Rinne thinks about his brother is that’s he’s stupidly _ugly_ , red all over, full of wrinkles, frail features twisting into a weird face that can only be the prelude to something terrible, like endless nights of no sleeping because this hideous thing can’t shut up. 

He looks way worse than any newborn animal Rinne has ever seen. At least there’s hope for them to grow fur and become cute with time. Rinne wrinkles his nose in a disgusted face. It’s like Hiiro is made of raw meat, and he can’t help but to try to touch him, wondering if he’ll feel like that too. 

That’s the moment Hiiro chooses to close his delicate fist around Rinne’s extended finger.

It’s not like a wave, nor a hurricane or a volcano. What Rinne feels can’t be explained in words, because is just so much more _intense_. It shakes the very core of his whole being, tearing all he is to the ground just to rebuild it anew in a few seconds.

And Rinne is no longer a lonely child or the heir to a throne, but an _older brother_.

Somehow, it feels much more important.

* * *

Years down the line, Rinne is awoken to two little hands shaking his arm.

For a confused second, he tenses, ready to bite and punch and fight against the unknown threat. His body relaxes almost immediately when his still somnolent mind register Hiiro’s blue eyes glistening in the dark. For a second, Rinne is tempted to put an arm around his little brother and drag him to bed with him, his warm presence comforting in the dark of his always cold, always lonely room.

The first five seconds of drowsiness pass, and Rinne thinks _what the hell?_

“What the hell?” he says out loud, just to make himself clear. An affronted sound escapes Hiiro.

“ _Nii-san_.” he says, tone too serious for his short age. He puts a hand against his mouth, expression dignified. “Language.”

Rinne grumbles. He looks out the window, at the pitch dark that’s waiting for them outside, and then turn his eyes back to Hiiro. For a second, they just stare at each other, and Rinne arms himself with patience to face whatever is to come.

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t look at me like that.” his words collide against Hiiro’s hand, and that seems to be the only sign his brother needs to finally let it drop. It finds its place around Rinne’s arm again, and then he’s yanking and pulling at him. The fact that he doesn’t give a single warning before acting might not be strange, but Rinne -still sleepy and definitely not in the mood to read the situation- almost falls to the ground. “Wh- Oi!”

“ _Nii-san!_ ” Hiiro yells-whispers, and it sounds scolding. “Sssh. You have to come with me.”

The look Rinne gives him can only be described as puzzled. He briefly turns to the window again, just to make sure that he wasn’t dreaming when he saw the crescent moon far off in the sky. It’s still night. Hiiro is supposed to be sleeping.

He’s still a kid, round features and high-pitched voice, but never once has Rinne witnessed his brother ignoring the rules on purpose. Like a child soldier, he learns, obeys and keeps himself silent, awaiting for the destiny the adults keep pushing upon him. Just a lifeless doll in the hands of someone much bigger, much stronger.

Rinne hates it. Sometimes he thinks he might hate Hiiro, too.

Every time, the idea melts away the second it crosses his mind. Because Hiiro - who took his first steps following after Rinne just to fall into his arms, who said _Ri-nii_ before he even tried to form the word mother, who has his same eyes and blood and his heart tucked away between his hands - is the best thing Rinne has. 

Right now, at least, but that doesn't matter. Rinne has always been one to live in present tense.

Here and now, Rinne is trying to be the best big brother he can. It’s hard not to, when just hearing Hiiro’s voice is enough to make him feel like he could fight the world and come out as the winner.

“Come.” Hiiro says again, the simple order followed by another pull to his arm. He’s using too much force, but it's still not enough - Rinne could probably go back to sleep, ignore him until Hiiro tires himself out and retreats to his own bed.

As good as that sounds, Rinne surrenders. He rolls his eyes in an exasperated motion, trying to convey how irritating is following his little brother’s order, but goes nonetheless. His covers fall around his lap when he sits up, and Hiiro loses no time in taking in entirely off him.

“They are going to go away, nii-san.” he says, sounding almost pleading. Rinne slowly blinks. He doesn’t even bother to put on his socks as he walks to the door.

“Who, Hiiro? If someone’s outside, we have to-”

“The _stars_.” he cuts him. Rinne’s mouth opens, just to close again. “The stars are dancing outside, nii-san.”

“You’ve gone bongers and bananas.” he states, because part of his duty as an older brother is being sincere. Hiiro looks frustrated for a second, lips pressed and hands clenching around the bed’s blankets.

He ends up throwing it around Rinne’s shoulders in a hasty movement before opening the door.

“I don’t know what you mean.” Hiiro whispers. Rinne feels a jab of frustration, because he would know if he just _listened_ to Rinne talking about what was outside their village, but once again- it’s not as if the fault is on him. Hiiro will understand, at some point. At least, Rinne hopes so.

Indulging him tonight might be a good first step. 

“What’s this?” Rinne says instead, trying to push away the blanket. Hiiro turns in a second just to keep it in place with fingers that close around the cloth like iron.

“Cold, nii-san!”

Rinne frowns. He thinks about asking _“what about you, then? Won’t_ you _get cold?”_ . And maybe it should be concerning, that Hiiro thinks so little of his own well-being already, but Rinne doesn’t know about that - still too young to understand all the nooks and crannies of his brother’s mind. In all simplicity, he puts an arm around Hiiro as they walk through the silents hallways of their home, to the front door.

Rinne is the one to open it. Hiiro dashes outside, blanket and embrace forgiven. The night air is not even that cold, and Rinne takes advantage of his brother’s excitement to get himself rid of the damn cloth.

Hiiro always smiles, and it never fails to get to his eyes. That’s something Rinne has come to know. It doesn’t matter who scolded him or how bad he messed up, the happy gesture never takes much to come back to his still baby-face. It always seems much more sincere than Rinne’s forced expression.

Rinne’s thoughts always show in his face, even if it’s in a gesture far too sardonic for a boy his age.

But that’s not what’s showing in his face now, and Rinne knows this - because the curve of his smile mirrors Hiiro’s as his little brother steps into the grass.

“Look, nii-san!” Hiiro twirls around once, then twice, gesturing at his surroundings. “The stars have come down to dance!”

Around him, unperturbed by his presence, the fireflies keep flying. 

Rinne knows what he should do. He knows he should tell Hiiro off, explain the difference between fiction and reality, break his childish fabrications. They’re not useful to Rinne as a leader.

The way Hiiro is beaming makes him so, so terribly happy as a brother, though.

“They say the stars only come down for those pure of heart.” Rinne says, curving an eyebrow.

“Do they?” Hiiro says, looking around himself. His eyes seem to gleam even more.

“So I should stay inside.” Rinne finishes, and he tries to take a step back. This - this little world where the magic exists, where for the first time in forever _his_ version of the story is the one that counts, where he can think for himself; if only for a moment - should be Hiiro’s. 

His little brother looks at him, eyes narrowed and clearly startled by his asseveration. He takes exactly three seconds to cross the few meters that were between them, just to catch his hand between his.

Those puppy eyes could take the world to its knees, if Hiiro used them for evil.

“What do you mean?” he says, so, so earnest. For a second, he looks as bright as the stars in their backyard or the ones in the sky. “Of course you should come.”

And of course Hiiro wouldn’t take his chance to be the relevant between the two of them for once. To be cherished by the universe itself, if only through Rinne’s words.

Rinne tries to get rid of his grip.

Hiiro manages to take him among the stars anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> me today, upon seeing the Hiiro anime cameo in my TL: I know the bright thingies are supposed to be stars but...they kind of look like he's in a field with fireflies??
> 
> My only funcional braincell, crying since YESTERDAY for these stupid brothers: AH YES. 
> 
> (also can you see my struggle to walk the thin line between canon Rinne....and baby Rinne...)


End file.
